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Jeffrey D. McSwain's avatar

There is something wonderful and terrible in your writing--a tension and suspense that is rare. You see things that others miss. In a way, this story is about that. Thank you for writing things down and sharing them. Your words are proof that the hive is real and alive, and that quiet battles rage beneath the surface of things.

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Julie Saeger Nierenberg's avatar

Wow! Love this! Great plot.

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AsukaHotaru's avatar

Oh wow—this felt like slipping into a nightmare with the edges still warm.

The pacing? The atmosphere? The quiet shift from “just a normal park day” to “the sky is no longer ours”? Chills. Actual chills.

I love how you threaded the ordinary through the uncanny until it snapped open into full horror. And that last turn—the queens-in-the-making—my brain is still buzzing. You’re building a world that feels too close for comfort in the best way.

I’ll be thinking about those underground tunnels for a while… and maybe avoiding lakes today.

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