Outcast by Blood, Warriors by Choice
A Guide to Empowerment for Young Girls exploring "The Guilded Ones"
Have you ever felt like the world expects you to be someone you're not?
Have you been suggested to hide the parts of yourself that make you unique or powerful?
Have you ever wondered if you will follow the rules that hold you back or break free and create your own path?
What will you choose: to be defined by others, or to embrace your true power and live fully?
“Are we girls or are we demons? Are we going to die, or are we going to survive? I want to survive. I want to live.”
— Namina Forna, The Gilded Ones
Deka (the main character of the debut novel by Namina Forna) is determined to survive in a world that constantly devalues her. Deka’s transformation — from being oppressed by a society obsessed with purity to becoming a fierce warrior who embraces her true power — mirrors the challenges many girls face in real life. Forna’s The Gilded Ones isn’t just a thrilling fantasy novel; it’s also packed with important lessons for young girls navigating a world that often tries to limit their potential.
Find What Makes You Different and Embrace It
Deka is cast out because of her golden blood — a physical trait that marks her as "impure" in the eyes of her society. At first, she’s terrified of her difference, feeling ashamed and rejected. But as the story progresses, she learns that what makes her different is actually a source of incredible strength.
“You are not my enemy. You are not my monster. You are me, and I am you. Together, we are power itself.”
In real life, society often pressures girls to conform — to look, act, or think a certain way to fit in. But like Deka, your uniqueness is your strength. Whether it's your personality, your talents, your cultural background, or your physical traits, embracing what makes you different will lead to self-discovery and power. Your individuality is a gift, not something to hide.
Take some time to think about the things that make you feel different or unique. Write them down and list the ways they could be strengths instead of weaknesses. Celebrate these traits, whether it’s through a journal, art, or simply sharing them with a trusted friend.
Question What You’re Told
In Deka’s world, the society’s rigid rules are based on religious beliefs that promote the idea of purity and control. Women are told their worth is based on whether they meet these impossible standards. As Deka grows, she begins to question these beliefs, realising they are designed to oppress, not uplift.
"They will always fear what they don’t understand, but you don’t have to let their fear control you. You don’t have to let them define you or your worth."
Deka realises that the rules of her society are rooted in fear and control. Don’t be afraid to question the expectations placed on you — whether from society, culture, or even well-meaning family and friends. Not every rule is just, and sometimes systems are set up to limit you rather than help you grow. Asking questions is the first step to understanding and shaping your own path.
When you encounter a rule or expectation that doesn’t feel right, ask yourself: “Who does this serve?” and “Is this something that helps me become the best version of myself?” Challenge assumptions, seek out knowledge, and find mentors who encourage you to think critically.
Your Body is Your Power
One of the central themes in The Gilded Ones is the way women’s bodies are controlled and judged by society. Deka’s golden blood is seen as something shameful, but it turns out to be the source of her greatest strength. This idea parallels how girls in real life are often made to feel self-conscious or ashamed of their bodies, rather than celebrating them.
"My anger burns through the last of my fear, and I embrace it, letting it fill me, letting it remind me that I’m not weak. I am powerful—more powerful than I ever imagined."
Your body is your own, and it is powerful. Society often sends mixed messages about beauty, strength, and what it means to be “acceptable”. But like Deka, the moment you embrace and love your body for what it is — strong, unique, and yours — you reclaim your power.
Practice self-love. Every day, look in the mirror and say positive things about your body — focus on what it allows you to do, rather than just how it looks. Surround yourself with media and messages that celebrate diverse bodies and avoid things that make you feel inadequate.
Find Strength in Sisterhood
Deka’s journey isn’t one she undertakes alone. She forms strong bonds with other girls who, like her, are considered impure and dangerous. Together, they learn that their strength comes not just from their individual abilities but from their collective power and support for one another.
"We are sisters, and we are together. Together, we are strong."
There is immense power in friendship and solidarity. Surround yourself with people who uplift and empower you, rather than compete with or tear you down. True friends celebrate your successes, support you through challenges, and help you recognise your own worth.
Strengthen your connections with other girls by reaching out to those who might need support or by building each other up. Engage in group activities, start or join clubs focused on empowering girls, or simply practice being a good friend by offering encouragement and lending a listening ear when needed.
Challenge the Idea of "Perfection"
In Deka’s world, the concept of “purity” is used to control and oppress women. The girls are expected to be perfect, according to society’s impossible standards. But Deka learns that striving for someone else’s definition of perfection only holds her back.
"Perfection is a lie they use to control you. Your worth isn’t defined by meeting impossible standards, but by embracing who you truly are."
The pressure to be perfect — whether in appearance, academics, or social life — is something many girls feel, but it’s important to remember that perfection is a myth.
No one is perfect, and trying to live up to unrealistic expectations can prevent you from discovering and celebrating your real talents and passions.
Set your own goals, based on what makes you happy and fulfilled, rather than trying to meet the expectations of others. When you feel overwhelmed by the pressure to be perfect, remember that growth and progress are more important than perfection.
Believe in Yourself
Deka’s story is one of self-discovery and empowerment. At first, she doubts her abilities and is weighed down by shame and fear. But as she learns to trust herself, she discovers that her power comes not just from her golden blood but from within.
“I am not my fear. I am not my shame. I am who I choose to be.”
You are capable of more than you realise. It’s normal to doubt yourself at times, but learning to believe in your own abilities is key to achieving your goals. You don’t need anyone’s permission to be powerful — that strength is already within you.
Start a daily or weekly confidence journal. Write down your accomplishments, both big and small, and reflect on the strengths you’ve shown in different situations. Over time, this will help you recognise the patterns of power and resilience in your life, boosting your self-confidence.
Deka’s path from fear to confidence, from rejection to acceptance, and from oppression to resistance offers valuable lessons for anyone seeking to be their true self, stand up against injustice, and find strength in sisterhood. By embracing these lessons in your own life, you can become the hero of your own story, just like Deka.
